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By ROBERT PRICE, Associate Editor --- Easy assembly. Says so right on the side of the box. I can do easy assembly. Easy assembly means you snap six pegs into six holes, maybe tighten a couple of screws. Then you stick a little paper umbrella into your icy, refreshing beverage, dangle your feet in the swimming pool, lean back and admire your handiwork. Your job is done. I opened the box containing my bistro table-slash-propane patio heater, purchased that afternoon from a home improvement store that I really should own stock in, and pulled out the instruction manual. Bad sign right off the bat. Instructions for something requiring “easy assembly” should be a single sheet, not a 16-page booklet. “Easy assembly” instructions should start out with the admonition: If you need to bother with these instructions, you are lacking in either testosterone, common sense or basic American ingenuity. The list of instructions started out with unpacking...
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