Another week like last week and I'm removing myself from the panel of experts. Finishing a week 8-7 is an embarrassment to our staff. If not for a stinky goat, I'd be in last place. Of course, there's always next week:

Todd Camps and Mason Kelley saved the experts from too much embarrassment with stellar 13-2 finishes. That's more like it.

Here are my selections for Week 5:

Bakersfield at Garces: Drillers take out their frustration of season's first loss on mediocre Garces team. This should get out of hand early.

Burroughs at Ridgeview: Flipped a quarter three times. Ridgeview (tails) came up twice. Maybe it'll win the coin flip tonight. Take tails.

East at Foothill: In ancient Greece, the Trojans used a horse to win a battle. East has its own workhorse in Andre Smith.

Golden Valley at Highland: Tim Hartnett knows Golden Valley, so I think the nomadic coach will have Highland prepared. 

Stockdale at Liberty: Mustangs are so hit-or-miss. They've been more miss than hit lately.

West Virginia at South Florida: Saw the Bulls play N.C. State (Mario Williams, Manny Lawson) in the Meineke Car Care Bowl in 2005. USF coach Jim Leavitt has built a great program in Lakeland.

California at Oregon: I'm torn. DIdn't know this until after I made my prediction but Cal hasn't won in Oregon since 1987. Good luck Bears.

Michigan State at Wisconsin: This isn't South Bend. MSU won't be scoring at will Saturday.

L.A. Harbor at Bakersfield College: A casino west of here set the over/under at 62 points. Go with the over.

Southern University at Alabama State: We picked this game because it's between undefeated teams that no one will know about. Hope you did some research.

Baltimore at Cleveland: Jamal Lewis has something to prove. The Browns saw plenty of gamefilm of Arizona's comeback and will utilize it for a win. 

Oakland at Miami: I can't believe I'm saying this but I agree with Joey Porter.

Pittsburgh at Arizona: Steelers West still has a lot to learn. Steel Curtain crashes this party in the desert.

Seattle at San Francisco: For fantasy sakes, I'm hoping the Niners stop Shaun Alexander but I think backkup Maurice Morris will come through for the Squawks.

New England at Cincinnati: Brady to Moss connection is a beautiful thing, unless you're a Colts fan like me. Still Pattycakes win by 14.

If you haven't had a chance to read about "Operation Raw Deal" I encourage you to do so. It seems that two Bakersfield men were among 124 busted by the DEA in the largest steroid investigation in U.S. history.

I've attached a link to the story: http://www.bakersfield.com/...

It says that one of the defendants -- Tyler Stumbo -- filled 88 steroid orders in a three-month period. Stumbo is just 23 years old. This is pure speculation but I'm sure his clientele are of a much younger persuasion. So who's buying those drugs?

I'm sure it's not just the meatheads at the local gym. Could there be any student-athletes at Bakersfield College or Taft College? How about high school athletes?

I'd like to think our area athletes would avoid the dangers of these drugs but sometimes the lure of success, college scholarships and money are too much for a young influential mind to overcome.

The fallout begins nationally in the coming weeks, and local fallout won't be far behind.

I had a bad week. Actually our panel of 7 sports experts and a goat had a bad week. We gave away 33 bumper stickers and Haddad did a few free oil changes courtesy of our ineptness at picking winners in Week 2. Good for you, bad for us.

Anyway, here's my picks for Week 3:

Bakersfield at Centennial: Centennial have the home field but the Drillers have the personnel. This has the potential to be closer than you might think, especially after Centennial's 1-point loss to East last week.

Liberty at Foothill: I picked against Foothill the last two weeks. So they'll either welcome with open arms or wish I'd taken Liberty.

HIghland at Garces: Tim Hartnett seems to have Highland poised for a breakout but experience stil on Rams side.

Tehachapi at Stockdale: Warriors make the trip down the mountain and build on that momentum for a big non-league win.

Golden Valley at East: Andre Smith should reach the 1,000-yard rushing mark after just four games.

South Carolina at LSU: UPSET SPECIAL. I'll be upset if LSU wins.

East L.A. at Bakersfield College: I just keeping singing "Born in East L.A."

Georgia at Alabama: Nick Saban proves why he 's a great college coach.

San Jose State at Utah State: With last week's win by Duke, Utah State is now the worst D-I football program.

Washington State at USC: Trojans might have a letdown in first quarter but other three quarters will more than make up for it.

San Francisco at Pittsburgh: Manny Lawson's injury hurt but Niners were going to lose this game regardless.

Indianapolis at Houston: Andre Johnson's absence means 9 Colts in the box stopping Ahman Green.

Miami at N.Y. Jets: Trent Green gets Dolphins offense in gear.

Arizona at Baltimore: I don't know why but I have this secret desire for the Cardinals to finally make the playoffs.

Cincinnati at Seattle: Bengals can't play defense against a third-string QB. Why would they stop Hasselbeck.

OK, Week 1 is over with and we're a few hours from kickoff for Week 2. I got lucky last week with one of my picks. I thought I picked the Bears but somehow I took San Diego. Good for my picks but bad for my fantasy team. I finished 11-4 thanks to the human error but at least I'm smarter than a goat. Anyway, as promised here's a breakdown of my picks for the week:

HIGH SCHOOLS

Bakersfield at Clovis Buchanan: Pete Mitchell isn't a prototypical quarterback but he manages the game and is deadly accurate.

Liberty at West: Liberty can't start the season 0-3. The Patriots score at least 3 TDs in win.

Foothill at Shafter: I picked Foothill to lose last week, and for some reason I'm picking against them, again. I've got a little something for country bumpkins.

Delano at Hanford West: I don't know anything about Hanford West. They weren't ranked in Bob Barnett's poll, so I'm taking Delano.

Centennial at East: East escapes North last Friday. I know Centennial will be focused on stopping Andre Smith but I just don't think they can.

COLLEGES

Bakersfield College at L.A. Southwest: No explanation needed.

Fresno State at Oregon: Ducks win in the Big House, imagine what they do in their house.

USC at Nebraska: Huskers escape with a win at Wake Forest. C'mon USC by 14 points.

Notre Dame at Michigan: Charlie Weis is looking for some devine guidance, he needs to watching Saving Grace.

Tennessee at Florida: A shout out to Florida linebacker Brandon Spikes. Unfortunately, he'll be chasing Vols for most of the game.

NFL

San Francisco at St. Louis: Patrick Willis is the second-coming of Mike Singletary.

Houston at Carolina: If David Carr steps on the field for a center snap it will likely be with the Victory formation.

Indianapolis at Tennessee: Trap game for the Colts. I hope it doesn't come down to a 60-yard FG like last year's game. Addai finds a few holes in the Titans defense.

Minnesota at Detroit: Still no doghouse in the backyard. My wife insists I take the Vikings.

San Diego at New England: So which cheaters do I take. The steroid using, gun-toting, Xstasy sellers OR the videotaping, smug, pompous patsies. Chargers in a huge road win.

 

Arizona's defensive meltdown in the final minute Monday Night capped an incredible week of picking for this "expert." I have to use quotes around expert after my dismal 10-5 performance.

I started off 4-1 after Friday's high school football games. But there was nothing special about my upset special of Chavez over Foothill. Chavez didn't register a point until the fourth quarter against Foothill's second-stringers. Uggh.

Didn't fare any better Saturday as the ol' ball coach, Steve Spurrier, managed to waterboard the dawgs in Athens, Ga. Then, I selected Virginia Tech solely out of spite. I can't stand LSU for its lax schedule over the years, and secondly, the expert that won this contest last year was a huge LSU fan. So I've requested that LSU games not be used in the contest for the year. Kidding, you might see an LSU game if they make the SEC Championship.

As for the NFL games, the Bears defense shut down L.T. and the Chargers for the first half but their hapless offense didn't stand a chance in the second half. And then, the MNF debacle. Could someone explain to me why Arizona cornerback Eric Green didn't just slide on top of the ball in the end zone? Ahhh..this explains it. He went to Virginia Tech.

If Green recovers the fumble, I at least look halfway intelligent. Instead, I'm as smart as the flea-bag in Griff's backyard.

We're less than four days from the first games of Beat the Experts. Make sure you register, it's free, and top prize is a LG 32-inch LCD intergrated HDTV from Urner's. Plus, you'd earn bragging rights for a full season around Bakersfield.

Each week, I'll make my selections public on this blog, as well as offer some incite on to why I chose my selections. There's no rational for my picks, so don't copy.  Feel free to go against my picks. As a matter of fact, I've had to flip my share of quarters, dimes, nickles,  Susan B. Anthony's, Loonies, Toonies, etc., in order to make a few of my decisions over the years. Explains why I lost a few bucks in college to my fraternity's residential bookie.

OK, so here we go with the first week. (My selections in bold):

HIGH SCHOOL GAMES
Stockdale (0-1) at Bakersfield (2-0): I've covered my share of high school football across the nation, BHS has one of the most complete teams I've seen in my 9 years in the business.

Liberty (0-1) at Centennial (1-0): Liberty scores this week but Golden Hawks have the home-field advantage.

East (1-0) at North (0-1): I'm hoping Andre Smith eclipses the 3,000-yard mark this year, just so I can use the headline: Andre 3000.

Chavez (0-1) at Foothill (1-1): You can afford to pick an upset early in the season. Just don't take too many.

Garces (1-1) at Arvin (0-2): Last week's win against Visalia-Central Valley Christian helps the Rams regain some confidence.

COLLEGE GAMES
El Camino (1-0) at Bakersfield College (1-0): Top two teams in the state. Jacob Bowyer and Brandon Banks are cash money for the Renegades.

Virginia Tech (1-0) at LSU (1-0): Apparently my predecessor took LSU every week. I'm here to prove I'm nothing like him with this pick.

South Carolina (1-0) at Georgia (1-0): Can you believe the folks in the Carolinas have the nerve to call South Carolina, the real USC. Just another reason why I moved to California. Don't mess with a Dawg between the hedges.

Texas Christian (1-0) at Texas (1-0): Anything to do with the University of Texas was a sore spot for me a few years back, but I've let it go.

BYU (1-0) at UCLA (1-0): Don't believe BYU has the team this season to pull of an upset.


NFL GAMES
Atlanta at Minnesota: The Vikings harassed Joey Harrington when he was in Detroit. So this will be nothing new. Plus, my wife is a huge Vikings fan, and we don't have a doghouse.

Carolina at St. Louis: Spent some time sitting the Bank of America Stadium press box watching the Panthers. Pick is purely based on a lack of objectivity, plus I know Todd Camps will pick the Rams.

Arizona at San Francisco: Two up-and-coming teams with high expectations, but the new Cardinals find a way to win on the road.

Chicago at San Diego: Last year's No. 1 seeds for the playoffs. Chargers suffer second straight home loss.

N.Y. Giants at Dallas: That Son-of-a-Bum Wade Phillips gets his first win in the Big D.

Other than a alum from Ann Arbor, who would be disappointed with Michigan's loss on Saturday. A few college football pundits have classified Appalachian State's victory the biggest upset in the history of the sport. It might be in their eyes, but if they would have watched the Mountaineers for the past few seasons, if wouldn't be as shocking.

To me nothing is more exciting than watching a MAC (disclosure: Ball State alum) or WAC team knock off a BCS team. You could compare the Mountaineer's victory Saturday to that of Boise State's win over Oklahoma to a small degree. While Boise State is still D-I, they were once considered a patsy, catwalk opponent. You probably could say the same about Fresno State a number of years back. Not anymore, maybe this becomes a wake up call for the BCS to allow more teams into the system. 

While it was a monumental win for the public university in Boone, N.C., a quaint backwoods ski resort in the western tip of the state, the victory came as no surprise to me. I lived and worked less than two hours from the campus, and four of the current players on the ASU roster played football in our coverage area.

While I didn't see kicker Julian Rauch in high school, his lore at Ashbrook High in Gastonia, N.C., seemed to grow with each game-winning kick. I'm sure he'll be a member of the Green Wave Hall of Fame in the coming years (a list that includes Laker great James Worthy). His line-drive FG gave the Moutnaineers the 2-point cushion with under a minute left.

Winning back-to-back Division I-AA National Champions might seem small in the eyes of Bakersfield and all the Pac-10 football fanatics in the area, but the Mountaineers are better than the bottom half teams of some of the BCS conference teams. Appy could replace a number of ACC teams (Duke, and if not for a surprising 20006 turnaround Wake Forest), Big 12 (Baylor 13-43 since 1996, and a little irony coach Jerry Moore is an alum), Big Ten (Indiana hasn't had a winning season in since 1994 and a bowl berth since 1993), Big East (Cincinnati and Villanova, ummm DePaul and Marquette don't even have football teams), SEC (Kentucky) and the Pac-10 (Washington, just want a reaction from alum Mason Kelley).

You have to give coach Moore credit for recruiting the best second-tier players in the Southeast. Seems like once the Florida schools, then the SEC programs, then the top ACC programs, and finally UNC and South Carolina have picked over the recruiting class, then Appalachian State gets the best available players. Sometimes a Division I player falls in their laps but most of the time its the "highly-educated, easily coachable but not physically-gifted" players that end up in Boone. 

Those "non Division I -type" players just shocked the world. Well, except for the folks in Boone, N.C., and a sports guy here in Bakersfield.