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Saying goodbye to an old friend
I was in Tehachapi today for another reason. A longtime family friend had passed away last week and today, at a ranch in Cummings Valley, we celebrated his life. On the way up Mark and I talked about the experience of growing up in Tehachapi. He talked about some of the horse rides he'd been on with the friend who'd passed away. He was a hard living, hard working guy and one of the most courtly gentlemen I've ever known. Right behind his Dad that is. Tehachapi may not be unique in it's small town-ness but it was an experience I'm very grateful to have given my kids. When I first moved to Tehachapi I found it very cliquey ((sp?)and the people standoffish. Of course, My kids dad, my kids and I moved into the Boise Cascade Golden Hills equestrian center in the middle of a push to develop Golden Hills. The locals didn't take too kindly to city folk. My second hitch in Tehachapi went a lot smoother since I had married one of the local fair haired boys. The kids ran free for the most part. Riding horses, bicycles and later motorcycles all over the hills. They formed groups as kids do in all cities with cowboys, jocks, and motocrossers. There were still the "upper class" but most of the people were pretty good neighbors. Like anyplace there were problems bot overall, it was a great place to raise kids. I can't speak for these days, I left in 1985 and never regretted it. When we got out of the truck at the ranch one of the first things Mark said was "I miss the climate here". It was windy with clouds scudding across the sky and chilly in the shade. I said I was nuts for forgetting that you need a sweater at hand all the time in that town and Mark said he was surprised to see me walk out of the house without one. Unpredictable weather, 4 seasons all in one day, wind, wind and more wind. But, no fog, no smog, and you could see every ripple on the mountains. I had forgotten how fresh the air is up there. I looked around, we drove around looking at the crazy building going on up there and I tried so hard to work up some emotional bond with the area. Nope, nada, zip. No tender feelings, no desire to move back. It's all changed. All except the weather and even it's not as severe as it used to be. It's busy, crowded, trafficky. For those who visit the area and want to live there, I say "Go for it." I say "call a Realtor and start packing." When you find it's a bit inconvenient shopping wise I'll leave you with this though. When I first moved there the town closed at 5 pm. All but the 2-3 bars and the bowling alley coffee shop. Oh yeah, I think Kelcy's was open til 9. On Sunday the only thing open was the liquor store. The Beekay Theater ran 3rd rate films, there were 3 family owned grocery stores, all downtown. Everyone shopped with a Wards and later a Sears Catalog. Koutroulas Dept Store and Yeagers were the only clothiers, one pharmacy, one doctor, one dentist, one dime store. The museum mentioned on the other blog was the library two blocks from my apartment. The apple sheds were real apple and pear sheds. Pear orchards were everywhere and the high school boys stayed in the bunkhouse ready to smudge on freezing nights. I could go on for hours but I've rambled enough for now. Not many people get to go to an old friends memorial for a birthday trip but that's what I did. How strange to come home and find a blog about the very place I had just come from. Mark and I pulled up old memories of our own of that mountain town and it's people. Godspeed Rickie, One final bull ride, one last bronc. And one less light in our lives. 13 comments from 11 users
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posted by
NancyII
on Jun 14, 2009 at 11:20 PM
I have to say that there wasn't much structure in the piece above, it rambled willy nilly as did my thoughts. I must add that I hadn't seen Ricky in a few years but he's one of those people who is just always there. Never forgotten. I mentioned his coourtliness and his fathers. When I spoke with his father today he took my hand in both of his and kissed it. One of the most touching gestures I can remember. They are a family of scrappers but as Mark put it (paraphrased) they would fight just as quickly for your honor if you were a friend. That kind of gentleman is rare these days and I'm saddened that we now have one less. posted by
ALICEN
on Jun 15, 2009 at 06:58 AM
I'm sad for you, Nancy, that there's one fewer gentlemen in the world. I'm sorry for the loss.
posted by
siouxcityranch
on Jun 15, 2009 at 08:14 AM
the really sad part is they dont make em like this anymore so most our kids are going to grow up confused and exposed to the down side of what people are trying to get passed these days and never experiencing what a 'REAL MAN' is like. sorry for yours and Marks loss...the good part is he was in your lives posted by
antiextremism
on Jun 15, 2009 at 08:43 AM
My condolences to you and Mark, Nancy. posted by
sagefever
on Jun 15, 2009 at 08:48 AM
Sounds like a life well lived and your life was the better for knowing him. posted by
AudreyB
on Jun 15, 2009 at 08:55 AM
I'd take the inconvenient shopping anytime if it meant I got to breathe clean air. Sorry for the loss of your friend Nancy. It sounds like he was a great guy. posted by
NancyII
on Jun 15, 2009 at 09:54 AM
Mark mentioned that we hear people say what a great guy someone was or how they had a good heart, good father etc when we know they were always in trouble. We wondered if we were doing that to our old friend. This guy would fight at the drop of a hat but as far as Mark knew he didn't start them. He drank hard, partied hard but if you were a friend, you were a frind for life. His brother, seaking at the memorial said "he lived a hard life, but that's the way he wanted it." In Ricky I'm reminded of an old Faron young country song... Live fast, Love hard, die young, and leave a beautiful memory. THAT was Ricky. RE shopping in Tehachapi. It' s not like it was when I lived there. They have Albertson, Save Mart, K-Mart, Home Depot, Taco Bell, burger King, Subway, Starbucks, a movie theater and just about all the chains you'd see anywhere. The traffic worse, the roads that weren't there before just popped up. Tucker punched all the way through to Highline where we took a potholed dirt track if we felt adventuresome..lots of changes. New houses everywhere, and my unobstructed view of Brites lake is now clogged with houses. It's just not for me. All I knew there is just about gone anyway. posted by
mrsearnhardt88
on Jun 15, 2009 at 11:13 AM
Hugs to you and Mark... posted by
witbee
on Jun 15, 2009 at 12:44 PM
Sorry for your Loss, Nancy. I was telling my wife about all the little towns in the Tehachapi area. I told her that every time I hear of a town in Kern county that I've never been to or possibly even heard of, it is probably up there somewhere. I could see myself moving up there. It reminded me a lot of my favorite place in the world: Laramie, WY. However, I'm in my current house for at least 5 more years. Six if we comntinue upgrading. posted by
ghostriter
on Jun 15, 2009 at 03:02 PM
Nancy, I have lived up the hill for 13 years, and the changes only since I moved there are amazing. I know you lived there longer, and when it was the kind of town I loved and grew up in. Most of the changes unfortunately are not good, I agree. Too many new stores and fast food places. (The day they actually build a Walmart up there, I hope I am already gone.) Too many roads, too many car accidents. The only good thing I think is the new restaurants. We needed a few really good eateries. I live in Golden Hills, but I used to live in Stallion, and I loved it there. My condolences on your friend's passing. posted by
LoveVintage
on Jun 15, 2009 at 10:09 PM
I never thought for a moment that what you were writing, would be considered rambling. It was like listening to a friend talk about a dear friend that has passed. That's my kind of reading & talking. It conjured up memories & fondness of times that have passed me by all to swiftly. Those wonderful friends from years ago, that we think of from time to time but never get around to visiting. It sounds like he had a great send-off...surrounded by family & friends and filled with stories of happiness & love. I only hope that when my day comes, I have people remembering the good times as well. I may have read it the wrong way Nancy, but is it your birthday today? Not many people get to go to an old friends memorial for a birthday trip If so, Happy Birthday to you, Happy Birthday to you, Happy Birthday Dear Nancy, Happy Birthday to you :o) posted by
LoveVintage
on Jun 15, 2009 at 10:10 PM
Oh, and if I read it wrong....disregard the happy birthday song - haha! posted by
motopoet
on Jun 16, 2009 at 08:13 AM
Yes, Love, it was Mom's birthday. She said to me at breakfast at my house that morning, "No See's candy? But you're taking me to a funeral for my birthday"? I am putting my own post about Ricky as soon as I find an hour or so to do it.
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