Real Name: Ray Harwick Member Since: June 22, 2008 Last Signed In: November 22, 2009 Profile Views: 2023 Blog Views: 13732 Teen says "I hate being gay" - A gay Christian responds Today in Traditional Marriage Christians can't get arrested In Washington D.C. Religious Right "trawling for assassins" Traditional Marriage News, Fri., Nov 13, 2009 Sanctity of Marriage Gets Broadsided: Husbands Abandon Wives With Cancer Republican National Committee, Baby Killers? Rhode Island Gov. vetoes bill allowing gays to bury their partners How To Open A Bottle Of Wine Without A Cork Screw Mental Health Break: Tricked On Halloween July 08 August 08 September 08 October 08 November 08 December 08 January 09 February 09 March 09 April 09 May 09 June 09 July 09 August 09 September 09 October 09 November 09 
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Blog note: As a follow-up to blogger SiouxCityRiver's excellent post about Kyle Rice, I decided to provide some background to show how gays, themselves, responded to the young man's article. What follows is author Tim Kincade's response to Kyle's article. I'd also like to thank SCR for providing that story. I had a very similar experience in my own youth and I was deeply touched by what Kyle had to say.
The Advocate | Oct. 9, 2006
http://www.advocate.com/exc...
Like Kyle Rice ("I hate being gay"), this author grew up fundamentalist and gay. As a monitor of "ex-gay" ministries, he knows their lies. As a Christian, he knows God's acceptance.
By Timothy Kincaid,
It saddened me to read in The Advocate the article penned by Kyle Rice, the young man who hates being gay. Not only because he is so unhappy, but because it reminded me of where I came from.
Like Kyle, I was raised conservative Christian. My father was, and still is, the pastor of a Pentecostal church. And like Kyle, I did not want to be gay.
I'm not going to try and change Kyle's mind about his faith. Nor am I going to try and convince him to embrace his sexual orientation or discourage his political activism. But I do want to caution Kyle about his decision to participate in an "ex-gay" ministry. I write at a Web site that is dedicated to monitoring these ministries and have become familiar with the methods, claims, and motivations of their movement. It is from this experience that I offer the following advice to Kyle:
Kyle, when you have been told that you can "change," they do not mean that you will change your attractions. The change spoken about is only a change in how you identity yourself. You will be encouraged to view yourself no longer as gay but as a nongay person who suffers from same-sex attractions.
The national leaders of the "ex-gay" movement don't often admit it to the press, but when asked they will acknowledge that they are still attracted to the same sex. Those few men who are married are not attracted to women in general but have developed an attraction to one specific woman, their wife. One leader recently told a workshop that he was unable to consummate his marriage during the first nine months.
Although a few of the most visible "ex-gays" are married, for the vast majority "change" means living a life of celibacy. This may at first seem acceptable to you. But remember, Kyle, this is not only giving up sex; it also means you will never hold hands, kiss, or cuddle in front of a fire.
And should you decide that you like a woman "enough" to marry her, please know that not only will you be giving her only a portion of yourself but you are interfering with her ability to meet a man who can love her the way she deserves to be loved. Also, nearly all "ex-gay" marriages end in divorce-including the unions of many who were at one time leaders in the movement and held up as testimony.
I don't know if it is possible to change one's orientation. But I do know that the overwhelming majority of people who go through these ministries never succeed in doing so. I know people who have tried for decades without success, and I don't know any who entered an "ex-gay" program as fully homosexual and are now fully heterosexual. If this happens at all, it is very rare, and you should understand that it's really very unlikely that it will happen to you.
And finally, Kyle, the "ex-gay" ministries will tell you things that are not true. Perhaps they don't mean to lie, but the things you will be told about "the homosexual lifestyle" are not at all reflective of the lives that gay people lead.
You may be told that gays were all molested, will die by age 42, have hundreds of sex partners, don't establish lifelong relationships, or even that gays are not capable of love to the depth that straight people experience. Perhaps you will be told that gay people wish to destroy marriage, hate Christians, want to overthrow society, or seek to molest children. None of this is true. I think you know better, Kyle, but it can be very persuasive when all the people around you repeat these things.
But the most damaging and difficult lie of all is that you cannot be gay and Christian. I don't say that because I think Christians should never try to change their orientation.
I say that because the vast majority of people who do try will never experience such a change.
And when they finally give up their long, futile struggle, they often believe that this means they must also abandon their faith. I pray that when you discover you have not become straight you will not then believe that you must give up your relationship with God.
I know that you have a certain understanding of Scripture that tells you homosexuality is incompatible with God. But God also instructs us (in the King James translation) to "Study to shew thyself approved unto God, a workman that needeth not to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth." This means that we cannot rely solely on what our church has told us, or even on our understanding of the Bible, but we must listen to others and seek the truth from what different scholars have to say. And while some biblical scholars agree with the position your church teaches, others do not. I encourage you to read for yourself what they have to say.
My final advice to you, Kyle, is this: However it was that you came to be gay, God made you this way. And whatever you feel about what God wants you to do about it, we do know one thing: God doesn't want you to hate yourself. Nor does he want you to hate any part of the way he created you.
I wish Kyle happiness and peace. I hope he finds a way to reconcile his attractions with his faith. But most of all, I will pray that he learns to love himself.
I invite others of you who are people of faith to do the same.
About the Author: Timothy Kincaid is a gay Christian and author who wrote to Kyle Rice in 2006, the year Rice submitted his article to The Advocate. At that time Kincaid was writing for exgaywatch.com, the largest and most comprehensive Web site dedicated to monitoring and commenting on the "ex-gay" movement. He is now a writer for BoxTurtleBulletin.com, a web site staffed by gay Christian writers who report and provide commentary on the spiritual topics of interest to the LGBT community.
Related topic of interest: Mission Impossible: Why Reparative Therapy and Ex-Gay Ministries Fail I'm a reader of Sam Heath's blog and am aware of his strongly held biblical point of view that woman need to submit to their husbands or to men in general. He's persistent in declaring that biblical point of view. Therefore, I dedicate this report to Sam.
by DAN SAVAGE on FRI, NOV 20, 2009 at 3:45 PMA man was just sentenced to 11 years in prison for beating his wife—with her consent Timothy Thompson, a former news reporter for Portland radio station KXL, will have 11 years and 6 months in prison to think about the severity of what he did to his wife Susan and their three young children, Knapp said. In a bench trial with no jury, Knapp found Thompson guilty of eight counts of assault and one of criminal mistreatment.... Since his arrest, Timothy Thompson said the bruising came from a single occasion when the couple’s “game” of correction got out of control. That story was clearly a lie, McKey said. The bruising was almost unbelievable—purple, green, yellow, red and blue. Knee to waist. Breast to navel. Looking more like the lividity of a corpse than injuries to living tissue, they were administered over years with such exacting care that no one would even notice them on a fully-clothed Susan, McKey said. The beating game came to an end when the police were called to the house because a woman was screaming. Thompson wasn't home but the police noticed cuts and bruises and that Susan Thompson, "was barely strong enough to lift her infant son." The Thompsons—Mr. and Mrs.—argued that the beatings were a game meant to compensate for Susan Thompson's "lack of discipline" growing up. The couple also wanted a "traditional American family," complete with a submissive wife who stays home with the kids, but Susan Thompson had a hard time submitting. So, beatings. It was all supposed to be "titillating and fun," Mr. Thompson told the court—it was supposed to be consensual sex play—but the court didn't buy it and neither do I. First, because Susan Thompson was punished when she tried to call her parents, which smacks—sorry—the typical abuser's attempt to isolate his victim. And then there's this: In April of 2009, the beatings escalated to 70 to 100 swats a day. Thompson decided to start using a surveyor’s stick instead of a belt because his arm was getting sore, McKey said. After he was done,daddy would sometimes have the children take the rod and smack the bruises, too, to “let mommy know she had to learn her lesson,” McKey said. Sorry, but it's not a consensual adult sex game if you're forcing your children to participate. Christ.
Timothy Kincaid
Conservative pastors rallied outside the Justice Department on Monday to test the limits of the newly expanded hate crimes law. Calling the new law – which broadens the definition of federal hate crimes to include attacks based on sexual orientation and gender identity – a clear threat to religious liberty, the group sought to defend their freedom to proclaim biblical truths. They were certain that preaching against homosexuality is now illegal. And they were there to be martyrs for their faith. But there were no arrests. No one had to join the Apostle Paul and Martin Luther King by writing from the jail cell to proclaim God’s glorious truth. Police were present, just as they are at all such public demonstrations. But, as Dana Milbank of the Washington Post noted they had better things to do: Anything other than sex “between a male and his wedded wife,” announced the Rev. Paul Blair, “is a perversion, and the Bible says that homosexuality is in fact an abomination.” No arrest was made. The Rev. Rick Scarborough, quoting Scripture, listed “homosexual offenders” along with thieves, drunkards, swindlers and idolators as those unwelcome in the kingdom of God. “To fail to call homosexuals to repent of their sin and come to Jesus is the highest form of cowardice and sin,” he said. No charges were filed. “Had people listened to our plea, there would be tens of thousands of people who had not died of a dreaded disease,” contributed the Rev. Jim Garlow. “This breaks our heart to see people die of AIDS.” No hands were cuffed. In fact, the few cops in attendance were paying no attention to the speakers, instead talking among themselves and checking their BlackBerrys. And, indeed, the cops were not interested because no crime was being committed. The Matthew Shepard Hate Crimes Act does not infringe on religious liberty or ban preaching against homosexuality or anything else they fear. The only time a minister need fear the law is if he is actively instigating violent attacks on gay people. But this reality is wasted on these activists. Even though their bait drew no bite, they remain convinced that Christianity is being criminalized. (Citizenlink) Gary Cass, president and CEO of the Christian Anti-Defamation Commission, said pastors who preach from the Bible could be held accountable if someone hears their sermon and then commits a crime against a gay-identified individual. “It puts the burden on the minister to have to read the minds of the people that are listening to him and be able to predict the future,” he said. “It has a very chilling effect on the minister’s speech, because the safest thing is to just say nothing.” And Janet Folger trumpeted her warning on WorldNetDaily Unfortunately, it’s too late for our freedom of speech, as so-called “hate crimes” legislation already passed Congress and was signed by Barack Obama into law as a part of the defense budget. That is why I stood with pastors like Rick Scarborough of Vision America, Mat Staver and Matt Barber of Liberty Counsel, Oklahoma Pastor Paul Blair, San Diego Pastor Jim Garlow, Gary Cass of the Christian Anti-Defamation Commission, Bishop Earl Jackson of Stand America, and others on the steps of the Department of Justice yesterday afternoon speaking out against the law that has already laid the foundation for the Criminalization of Christianity, as I warned about in my book by that same title. It can be difficult to understand exactly why these activists ignore the opinions of legal scholars who assure them that no such arrests will be made. It is odd that Christian voices calling for reason are ignored. It seems incomprehensible that a simple reading of the Constitution and the language of the law itself (which specifically excludes anti-gay preaching and teaching) would not assuage their fears. But then something began to seem familiar. You see, I’ve tried to have a conversation with a crystal methamphetamine addict who hadn’t slept in days. He explained why there was tinfoil over the windows and even the shower vent. He was worried that there might be a man hiding behind the stereo which was flush with the wall. Even though on a conscious level he knew and could sheepishly admit that his fears were baseless, the meth in his system compelled a paranoia which he simply could not ignore. With him, there was a logical reason to explain his irrational thinking. It was chemically induced. But why are these anti-gay activists convinced, against all evidence to the contrary, that preaching against homosexuality is now illegal? How do we explain their irrational thinking and baseless paranoia? Surely they aren’t all meth-heads. Right? Last night Rachel Maddow discussed the spreading fundamentalist Christian meme currently being sold on mousepads, bumper stickers, and even teddy bears. The meme? A recitation of Psalm 109 which is meant to make reference to President Barack Obama: "Let his days be few; and let another take his office. Let his children become fatherless; and his wife become a widow." Frank Schaeffer, a one-time evangelical leader, tells Maddow that this latest Bible-quoting campaign is nothing short of "trawling for assassins." Schaeffer, son of evangelical missionary Francis Schaeffer who is widely credited as the man who introduced the Religious Right to the Republican Party, appeared on Maddow's show to sound a warning". See the YouTube video of yesterdays Rachael Maddow show. Schaeffer's segment begins about 4:45 mark. Yesterday we learned that a woman diagnosed with cancer has a 21% chance of being abandoned by her husband while men diagnosed with cancer have 3% chance of being abandoned by their wives. Today there's this stat in the NYT this morning... Nationally, about a third of female murder victims are killed by a husband or boyfriend each year, according to the Justice Department. But that number was closer to about 45 percent last year in Kentucky.
A new study by a Seattle oncologist shows that when married men get a cancer diagnosis, 3% of the their wives leave them during the course of treatment. But when women get cancer, 21% of their husbands leave them. That's seventimes as many. When the man became ill, only 3 percent experienced the end of a marriage. But among women, about 21 percent ended up separated or divorced. Among couples who split up, divorce occurred, on average, about six months after the diagnosis, although there was wide variability in the timing. It is not known whether the illness prompted the breakup or whether the couples in the study who divorced were already experiencing marital problems before the diagnosis. If couples are happy before the diagnosis, it appears that men are more likely to abandon wives who become seriously ill. If couples are already troubled before a partner becomes ill, the finding suggests that women in unhappy marriages are less likely to proceed with a divorce if their husbands become ill. Sanctity of marriage issues? Maybe we should name this phenomenon after Newt Gingrich, who famously served his uterine cancer-stricken wife divorce papers while she was still in the hospital. What's should the expression be? The Gingrich Effect? Naw, too many possibilities there.
Were Focus On The Family and the Pope aware of THIS? The Republican National Committee’s health insurance plan covers elective abortion—a procedure the party’s own platform calls “a fundamental assault on innocent human life.” Federal Election Commission Records show the RNC purchases its insurance from Cigna. Two sales agents for the company said that the RNC’s policy covers elective abortion.
Informed of the coverage, RNC spokeswoman Gail Gitcho told POLITICO that the policy pre-dates the tenure of current RNC Chairman Michael Steele. “The current policy has been in effect since 1991, and we are taking steps to address the issue,” Gitcho said. Politico tells the tale.
http://newsblog.projo.com/2... Nuf said. This fourth grader is waiting to give a report about her dad who is in Iraq. |
Yesterday a collection of the nation’s most obnoxious anti-gay activists showed up in Washington DC to have a showdown with the government. They were there to defy the new law criminalizing preaching against homosexuality and to be arrested for preaching the gospel. (
