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Time for the Green Machine to move onnn..... this is a shot in the dark, but here it goesss.... Will you marry me, Watermelon? So you want to be on top? I'm in love with a trader, a trader named Joe. I'M FREEEE; FREE FALLINN' CAUL the doctor, i'm about to BLOOM up! Wasn't the Sixth Sense enough...? fish out of water... i thought i was only fuhked up in the head... February 08 March 08 April 08 May 08 June 08 July 08 August 08 September 08 Me in a nutshell :D 
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I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy...
Having an eating disorder has been the hardest thing I've ever dealt with in my life. For the past two years, anorexia has consumed my body, my mind, my family, my life! I've really been head strong on my recovery lately, and if you have ever met anyone who has or has had an eating disorder, recovery is the toughest thing in the world. My mom gave me 1/4 cup of dark chocolate covered raisins tonight after dinner and that stupid voice in my head said NO, you don't deserve these. I put them in my pocket and had planned to throw them away when no one was looking; an sneaky action most anorexics thrive in doing. But I looked in my mother's eyes and knew that in order to beat this thing, I have to be true to her, as well as myself. So I ate them, I ate them and then I stressed, stressed and cried. I'm 20 years old and I'm crying over something as little as chocolate covered raisins. I never asked for this disorder and wish everyday I could go back in time. But I can't Tonight: It's a step, a baby one that is, but it's a positive step. All those out there who are trying to recover from something, anything (smoking addiction, alcoholism, anything). I'm a 20 year old girl who is trying to recover from something too. You're not alone and niether am I. WE CAN DO IT. Even if it's baby steps. God gives us mountains he knows we can climb...
Good luck and fight the fight. I will, will you...? 5 comments from 5 users
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posted by
catpaw
on Apr 11, 2008 at 07:23 AM
Good for you! I'm happy to know that you are making a recovery. Your post gives me a mixed reaction: As I said, I'm happy for you. At the same time I am aware that a good number of young people and their loved ones are dealing with depression, drugs, and all kinds of self-destructive behavior. (I know of one teen girl who has been cutting herself for years.) These are not abused children; on the contrary, they come from stable two-parent families and many have siblings who are well adjusted and are getting along just fine. The biggest aggravation for parents and loved ones is they don't understand what the problem is. What did they do wrong? What can they do? Shrinks and therapists don't seem to be a whole lot of help. [I'm just a professional shrink with a doctors diploma on the wall and I don't know either. That will be $100.] Talking to their child doesn't give them any answers. Parents often feel like they are watching their loved one erode and don't know what to do. I feel for them as much as their child. If your post gives anyone encouragement, someone appreciates it. posted by
adampayne
on Apr 11, 2008 at 08:30 AM
We live in a crazy society. We are marketed to hate the way we look. If you took away all the advertising, infomercials and opinion mongers hawking, or expounding, on diet products and services along with all the drug advertising we might actually be able to enjoy television again. And we might enjoy one another again. Kudos on your commitment to good health. posted by
solidrocker7
on Apr 14, 2008 at 03:34 PM
Baby steps are signs that you are on your way, good luck with this and hope that you can conquer all posted by
NancyII
on Apr 14, 2008 at 03:46 PM
bakobornnraised... There are support groups out there for folks with eating disorders. Start going to one and if you don't like it, find another. They really help. posted by
lapetitemoi
on Aug 29, 2008 at 04:17 AM
Keep fighting, my love. :)
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